I want to talk about something that happened a couple of years ago. I was unhappy at my then job and was eating away my feelings. Long story short - I had put on weight. It really does not matter, right? I knew that in theory except when I had gone out with friends one day for a movie, one of my friends (a guy) turned to me and told me in the most judgmental tone - "the way you look, you can't expect to even think you will end up with some good looking guy." Now I have spent years talking about how looks do not matter but that one comment by someone who was considered to be my friend? It was only a throwaway incident but it stung. Badly. When I think back to that day, I still cringe.
When I look back I realise that despite the fact I thought of myself as someone who had great self esteem, I never stood a chance against that insult. You see all my life I had been led to believe that I was not enough. Even though I was raised by parents who at every step of the told me that I was perfect, I just had to look around at the world to realise how that wasn't the case. The Fair and Lovely products told me I had to use whitening products. That magazine cover told me that I had to lose my Freshman 15 in 15 days...or else. That makeup ad told me my skin was not great. And those movies that told me that the plain tomboyish Jane had to undergo a makeover before she got the guy. The images thrown at me made me feel insecure despite myself. And when you couple that with the fact I was still oh so young, I was easily bullied into believing that no guy will ever look at me because of the way I look.
Now why am I talking about something very very personal to me? Because of this picture.
When I first saw it, I saw a striking looking fit woman who was coming out of the water. However the caption that went along with the picture said one line - the cow went to the water. Ouch. Now I know people will tell me this woman is an actress and that when she chose to come into the limelight, she knew that it came along with online bullies. But I keep thinking about the young girls who see this picture. The next time they have to go swimming, this picture would vividly come to their minds. Of course now thanks to the internet, there are several ways to make a person feel bullied. And it's worse for girls. They have to constantly live up to unrealistic expectations when the men pretty much get away with murder.
WHY? I know that it's important to be fit. It's important to eat healthy food and exercise because that makes you healthy. It is not however okay to call a woman a cow! It's not okay to make a living out of putting others down. I realise that I am being far too sensitive about a stupid meme but I just have to go on Twitter or Tumblr to watch young teenage girls who live in a constant state of self loathing. And what's worse is that they are only byproducts of what society made them. What the media made them. I know we don't live in a perfect world but one day I hope we live in a world where people don't get satisfaction from putting someone else down.
When I look back I realise that despite the fact I thought of myself as someone who had great self esteem, I never stood a chance against that insult. You see all my life I had been led to believe that I was not enough. Even though I was raised by parents who at every step of the told me that I was perfect, I just had to look around at the world to realise how that wasn't the case. The Fair and Lovely products told me I had to use whitening products. That magazine cover told me that I had to lose my Freshman 15 in 15 days...or else. That makeup ad told me my skin was not great. And those movies that told me that the plain tomboyish Jane had to undergo a makeover before she got the guy. The images thrown at me made me feel insecure despite myself. And when you couple that with the fact I was still oh so young, I was easily bullied into believing that no guy will ever look at me because of the way I look.
Now why am I talking about something very very personal to me? Because of this picture.
When I first saw it, I saw a striking looking fit woman who was coming out of the water. However the caption that went along with the picture said one line - the cow went to the water. Ouch. Now I know people will tell me this woman is an actress and that when she chose to come into the limelight, she knew that it came along with online bullies. But I keep thinking about the young girls who see this picture. The next time they have to go swimming, this picture would vividly come to their minds. Of course now thanks to the internet, there are several ways to make a person feel bullied. And it's worse for girls. They have to constantly live up to unrealistic expectations when the men pretty much get away with murder.
WHY? I know that it's important to be fit. It's important to eat healthy food and exercise because that makes you healthy. It is not however okay to call a woman a cow! It's not okay to make a living out of putting others down. I realise that I am being far too sensitive about a stupid meme but I just have to go on Twitter or Tumblr to watch young teenage girls who live in a constant state of self loathing. And what's worse is that they are only byproducts of what society made them. What the media made them. I know we don't live in a perfect world but one day I hope we live in a world where people don't get satisfaction from putting someone else down.
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